Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The endless struggle: Staying at home vs. Working

Some evenings when the day is really dragging I long for the days where I can wake up, shower, put on my suit, send Nick off to Grammy's, and go to court.  Come on, I get to shower for one.  I get to sip my coffee in the car and even play some music other then toddler tunes.  It's almost like every once in a while your body and mind just needs a change of pace.

There are days like today though, where I know that court is approaching tomorrow, I am trying to scramble for more time to prepare and I have a son to take care of on top of it that I wonder what I was thinking in the first place.  Sometimes it is almost like we load our plates with so much to do because we can't stand the thought of taking a second to relax  I have been struggling for months to balance my life.  I have my career in one hand and my family and son in another.  I have and always will put my family first.  So why don't I completely put my career on the backburner until I am done raising our children?  Well, ten years from now I will be sitting here after my children go off to school wondering where MY life went.  What did I enjoy before going to gymboree with my son, reading endless toddler books, and going for long walks to the park?  Can't I just figure this out ten years from now?  Sure I can but will anyone respect me, respect what I did for those ten years, what I gave up? 

No one looking in can completely understand what stay at home moms give up but also what they gain to stay at home with their children.  Some think we are merely being lazy, sipping our coffee while our little ones entertain themselves.  Well, that's not so true is it?  So for me, I try to balance both aspects of my life to gain the experience and build up my resume so that one day I can, if I so desire, continue on with my career full speed ahead.  It's not so easy but then again what is?


  1. What kind of law? Trial work, clearly. I was criminal defense.

  2. The endless debate in my life since I started my sabbatical....

  3. Family law, custody mainly. I do love me a little criminal law though! I used to do abuse neglect which I would love to go back to as a guardina one day.

    And yes's a day to day debate!

  4. That's a thoughts? You won't look back in 10 years and wonder where your life went, things keep changing and will know what's right for you in 10 years.

    Your blog was recommended at POM's Connect MEme Monday!

  5. I completely get what you are saying. After having my daughter, I returned to teaching when she was 5 months. It was a struggle; wondering if I had made the right decision. We are all different. I have since learned that for me to be a better mom, working makes me happy. It balances my life. I give stay-at-home moms A LOT of credit. It isn't easy!

  6. I love working but loved when I was home with my kids. I wouldn’t have traded it for anything.
    But it is different for everyone and it has to be your choice.
    Stopping by from SITS!
    Please stop by!

  7. Alicia,
    Life is a juggling act, but only you can say what is best for your family. Society can be very hard on both stay at home moms and those that continue their careers, so do what your heart desires. I enjoyed my visit via Happy FF and look forward to following you. Please stop over my blog for a visit, because it’s always nice to meet new friends.

  8. Found you on Friday follow. I'm a SAH/Homeschool mom. Singed up to follow. Can't wait to read more. Jamie

  9. Happy Friday Follow!!

  10. It is so true..only you can know what is best for your family. I do not undermine working moms either...especially after having been one at one point. The amount of time and effort I had to put into both parts of my life was monstrous! I give you a lot of credit as well.

  11. I'm a Friday Follower! I hope you can follow me too! http;//

  12. Happy Friday!! I am a new follower!!


  13. Hi,

    I'm a new follower From Friday Follow

    Hope you have a great weekend

  14. Hi! I came from the Follow Friday Blog Hop and am now following you!

    I look forward to reading all of your posts:)

    Tangie (3boyzmom)

    Great topic!! I was a SAHM with my oldest (was in college) and then worked part time at night when hubby got home with my 2nd...but with my youngest, who is 3, I went back to work when he was 9 weeks my 3rd kid I guess I knew I needed to get back to work...I was goinG CRAZY!!!!

  15. And I forgot to say, my happy medium is that I work in education, so I only work about 180 days a year, so I can still have lots of time with my little guys:)

  16. I'm a new follower from Friday Follow!

    Suzi from

  17. I think about that everyday, especially when I'm sitting at my computer at work doing nothing when I could be at home with my girls. Excited to find and follow your blog! Happy Follow Friday from a new follower!

  18. I liked this post--my sentiments exactly, having been on both sides of that fence :)

    Following you back from your visit to me from Friday Follow! New follower as well !

    Stop by again anytime!

    Wendy @

  19. I'm a working mommy but long for the ability to stay home with my children(at least most of the time) :)
    Following you back for Friday follow

  20. Hi There! I'm still hopping around Friday Follow reading great blogs! It's my first Friday Follow! Hope you can visit mine. I now follow and subscribe.

    Bridgette Groschen
    Groschen Goblins

  21. Hey just stopping by to say Hi from Friday Follow!

    Happy Follow Friday!



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