Certain Level of Comfort with Number Two (baby that is)

My family went to visit some friends this weekend who just had their first child.  She is a beautiful baby girl, but SO incredibly tiny.  When I first saw her I instantly thought that there was NO way that my son was ever that tiny.  Sure enough their weight and height wasn't that much apart.  How is it that we could forget so quickly how small these little creatures are?  Infancy isn't just a walk in the park, it is a beautiful time period for both parents and baby, but no one would say that it s easy.  You would think after the journey we would at least be left with a picture perfect memory of those little buggers.

Maybe though the reason that we forget so quickly is sort of like the reason that we forget about child birth.  It may just be mother nature's way of populating this earth.  I am finally in my second trimester and I finally feel ready (well not totally) about having this second baby.  I have been so paranoid about my son, who will be 22 months when the next one is born, hating his sibling and throwing a fit every time I am holding the baby.  So of course this was my concern when I held our friend's baby.  He was so good though!  He did have one incident where he tried snatching the baby like a stuffed toy, but other then that I don't really think he knew that it was actually another human being.  He is totally different when I pick up another toddler.  Holding that little baby reminded me of how much we wanted to have another child.  Of course it is going to be hard, but I just can't wait to hold our second baby and experience everything all over again.  It also got me thinking a lot about breastfeeding and how I am really hoping that it works out this time around.  I had a lot of struggles with my first and I really hope that I can push through this next time around.  I feel like I should be able to handle it all a little better being through the infant phase once before...but who knows, I don't want to hold myself up to such big standards because this could lead to disappointmen.  I do know one thing, I will give it my best effort!